Title: Hi everyone. I’m having a hard time. When I started Only..

Message: Hi everyone.

I’m having a hard time.

When I started OnlyFans I thought I had made my peace with the reality of sharing pornographic material on the internet. I anticipated leaks and such. But the truth is I was a different person when I began this page. I had been violated so much that I didn’t care about any of it. That Alice was trying very hard to reclaim power and control over her body and sexuality.

And you know what?

I did for a while, still do actually, I have gained a lot of positives from this experience and I have taken it in a direction that is now very therapeutic for me. My stuff started being leaked a long while ago, everyone who does this experiences it eventually. For a long time I was doing well to ignore that because I was just another face in a crowd, I was a nobody, and it was all as expected.

It’s not publicly considered okay to complain when you willingly enter this work. But now I have an audience. With that comes a new, very different, very hurtful, flavour of content leaking. Now there is shaming, gawking and re-traumatising. People using my porn leaks to discredit my other works and insinuate false things about me as a person. Stuff I didn’t anticipate and make my peace with when I shared this media.

The other day some of my porn was leaked on the front page of Reddit and it was upvoted a fair bit, the very violating conversation around it has thrown me for a loop. I am suddenly again feeling out of control of my own body and sexuality, I am back to feeling like that heap of flesh on the floor being used and gawked at. I’m in an incredibly dark place right now.

I have put a lot of work into this page and all of my content. It is a genuine expression of my sexuality, creativity and my personal journey in discovering who I am. I’m sure if you’ve been following here for any length of time you’ve noticed my content shapeshifting. Because I am finding strength in who I actually am, and making what I want to rather than what I feel like people want from me.

I’ve spent countless hours upon hours writing, filming, photographing, editing, drawing, animating, recording to create things. It has absolutely never been a hustle and I feel like I’ve always been fair and kept my prices very low. I absolutely resent those who claim that every person selling content on this site is tricking people. This awful attitude of entitlement over pornography enables them to steal my work, declaring it worthless while spreading it around.

These people believe they are entitled to my content and my work and my body for free, and it is horribly violating. I’m a real person, I make things and I sell them. Just because those things are erotic, does not make me less of a person.

My subscribers here are very kind and wonderful and supportive and I appreciate you all a lot. Everything positive I've taken from this experience is thanks to you guys being here with me. You let me feel proud of myself sometimes even and I'm so thankful for that. That's why I've written all this, I think you deserve me being transparent and honest at least. I'm honestly really fucked up by all this and I just don't know where to go from here, I'll try my best to keep you posted. Who knows, maybe I'll just magically put a lid on it and manically continue as if nothing happened. That would be nice if that could happen.

Love you